I was having lunch with my friend (and blog reader) Barry a few days ago, and he was talking about the importance of relational ministry. He said something like:

We need to know people well enough to encourage them, help them, and spur them to obedient action.

That’s not the exact quote, but he used a variety of words that reminded me of Paul’s specific instruction to the Thessalonian believers (not just their leaders!):

And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. (1 Thessalonians 5.14, ESV)

Let’s break it down:

• Admonish the idle
• Encourage the fainthearted
• Help the weak

I wrote about this in detail about six months ago, but Barry added an important element. I wrote then that we needed wisdom to discern the difference between the idle who need admonishment (a kick in the backside to get them moving!), the fainthearted who need encouragement, and the weak who need help. Barry said you can’t tell the difference unless you know them. Unless you’re in a relationship with them. That will preach.

We weren’t aloof with you. We took you just as you were. We were never patronizing, never condescending, but we cared for you the way a mother cares for her children. We loved you dearly. Not content to just pass on the Message, we wanted to give you our hearts. And we did. (1 Thessalonians 2.7, 8, MSG)