This is the last of our series on the desired characteristics of believers in Ephesians 4, especially those involving putting off and putting on:

• Don’t lie – speak truth (verse 25)
• Don’t steal – give (verse 28)
• Don’t be hurtful – encourage (verse 29)
• Don’t be bitter – be kind (verses 31, 32)

Today, let’s think about verses 31 and 32:

Lay aside bitter words, temper tantrums, revenge, profanity, and insults. But instead be kind and affectionate toward one another. Has God graciously forgiven you? Then graciously forgive one another in the depths of Christ’s love. (Ephesians 4.31, 32, TPT)

Verse 31 seems to continue yesterday’s theme of how not to talk. “Bitter words” as TPT has it comes from “bitterness,” which literally means “poison.” My Navigator hero Skip Gray likes to say:

Bitterness is like drinking poison and waiting for the other guy to die.

And the text gives us an alternative to bitter words, temper tantrums, revenge, etc.: be kind.

Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no “root of bitterness” springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled. (Hebrews 12.14, 15, ESV)

Let brotherly love continue. Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. (Hebrews 13.1, 2, ESV)

If you’ve gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care—then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don’t push your way to the front; don’t sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand. (Philippians 2.1 – 4, MSG)

Those of us who are strong and able in the faith need to step in and lend a hand to those who falter, and not just do what is most convenient for us. Strength is for service, not status. Each one of us needs to look after the good of the people around us, asking ourselves, “How can I help?” (Romans 15.1, 2, MSG)